Joke of the week [227 = year 5, #19]  "tips to improve your English" (1)  (November 20 - November 26)

1)  Avoid alliteration. Always.
2)  Employ the vernacular.
3)  Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.
4)  Remember to never split an infinitive.
5)  Contractions aren't necessary.
6)  Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
7)  One should never generalize.
8)  Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."
9)  Comparisons are as bad as clichés.
10) Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.         

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